Burping

next time you burp
and you say
'pardon me.'
do yourself a favor and run with it for a while
like:

'no! really! pardon me! c'mon, ya prick! pardon me! pardon the fuck outta me! i double fucking dare you to pardon me, you low class nazi bastard! pardon me or i'll kick the living fuck outta your sorry ass! what's wrong with you? why don't you just give me a pardon, for christ's sake? pardon me awready! pardon me! pardon me or die! say it! Say It!! SAY IT!!!'

then smash a lamp against a wall and fall to the floor screaming as if insane

if you really commit to the moment
it would be very funny

i promise...