My Eighth Day On Zoloft

i'm gonna try to spare you most of the details here
but
i feel this should be mentioned...

masturbating has been a real task lately. something that i've been very good at for a very long time (it was my major in high school) has become an olympic event or something. it takes a lot more time, a lot more work, and a lot more concentration. it'd be great if i had a partner

(you blonde chicks on my friends list know who you are.
*winks and flashes you a thumbs up*
how ya doin'?
call me!)

but
being alone it's a bummer.
sometimes i just give up.

and you know what?

i don't get angry about it.

it wouldn't bother me half as much if the pay off was equal to the work involved. i think when the orgasm finally hits it ought to make me pass right the fuck out and, when i wake up i should know the secret to cold fusion or how to fly by using just my arms. another language at least. but when i do get off (if i do) it's a let down.

i mean
it's good
(it's always good)
but
not as good as i think i deserve.

the last time it was such a monstro chore that i slapped myself on the back after.
sure
maybe i should have washed my hands first
but
i figured it was a rented tux so
you know
fuck it...




(from 'The Zoloft Notes')